Dichotomy

Incredibly anxious and curious to see and meet this baby.

Sorry and scared that during this pregnancy I ate too much sugar, drank too much tea, drank too much decaf, took that one tylenol, had too many severe headaches, got my heart rate up too high at the gym, took my prenatal vitamin a few hours after dinner instead of with dinner, ate too many carbs, ate too much fish, got sick just days after working…and just days after being conceived, drank all that beer and wine (not that I even knew about those rapidly dividing cells overtaking my uterus).

I knew better. I should have tried to keep running, gone to the gym a little bit more, and most certainly should have snacked on more fruits and vegetables, and way less ice cream.

Smothered in guilt and she’s not even here yet.

don’t know how I’m going to give the care and love she deserves, but she’ll get it in such sweetly, concentrated doses.  I’ve only been to one class this semester, and I can’t fathom how I’m going to get through the semester in one piece.  I can’t fathom how to give you the attention you deserve,  but we’re going to get through it.

We might read more journals about cardiology and patient safety than Eric Carle books, but we’ll get through this.

Ready or not….let’s roll!

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